To be honest, I almost consider myself a newlywed still. My husband and I have been married almost 2 1/2 years, but I plan to be married to him for another good 50 or 60 years if I'm lucky - so in the grand scheme of things, we really are still newlyweds. But for today I am talking to those of you who have been married for a year or less, and even those who are currently in the midst of planning a wedding.
Getting married is one of the most exciting days in a person's life. I don't have any children yet, but I am sure the day your child is born is a strong rival. It is so easy to get wrapped up in all the festivities and planning and gifts and possibly decorating a home together for the first time. All of that is important and you should relish those moments. But at the same time, it is important to be realistic. At some point, the wedding is going to be over, the family is going to go home, you are going to come home from your honeymoon and it is just going to be the two of you. So now what?
What happens when life goes back to normal, only now it's not just you? Now, you are sharing the bathroom in the morning, stepping on someone's toes besides your dog's when cooking dinner at night. You no longer are king/queen of the remote during prime time television. I am not naive - many people have already experienced all of this long before they got married. But for many living together doesn't come until after the wedding - and it can be a huge adjustment period. Patience. Understanding. Compromise. These are the words you need to live by during those first few
"The first year is the hardest." Did anyone else hear this from friends and relatives prior to getting married? I sure did . . . and like a lot of people I'm sure, my response was "whatever . . . it won't be that bad." And at first it wasn't. But after about 6 or 8 months my husband and I really struggled. There were some deep-seeded issues that I refused to deal with - both personal ones and relationship issues - and the ignorance only made matters worse. Communication is so important. And until I learned to communicate, those problems remained.
I'm not an expert, but based on my experience there are four things that I would recommend you keep in mind as a newlywed in order to help safeguard your relationship.
You have so many wonderful memories to make ahead of you. Cherish those memories - and if you do have dark days, fall back on those good times to carry you through. Trust each other, love each other, cling to one another. You are a family now, so remember that.
Hi! I'm Amberly and I blog over at Life with Amberly and Joe . It's my place to share the story of our marriage, the adventures we have, our love for each other, moments of laughter and our crazy busy life! We are happily married and forever young at heart!
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